Tokio Hotel: random! tokio hotel stories
by BiersackObsession
Summary: random one chapter tokio hotel stories i write. funny! plz R
1. cocka legs

**A/n **

**Ok random tokio hotel fan fic I know there's lots of them around but I'm bored so I'm Gonna write one hope you like.**

**Disclaimer: Yeh I so own the boys….. NOT! I own nothing! I only own what I don't own which is everything that I own when I say I own nothing…. Get it? It means I own nothing! Kay? Good.**

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"Ahhhhhhhhhhh," bill screamed.

"What?", tom asked running into the room.

"It's a cocka-legs," bill screamed, pointing at a cockroach on the floor.

Tom stepped on the cockroach and squished it just as Gustav ran into the room.

"I heard screaming, what's wrong?"

"Nothing anymore," bill replied, "it was a cocka-legs but tom squished it for me."

"Good I hate those things, now if you don't mind but I'm, trying to take a nap." Gustav said in an angry tone.

Wow thought tom, he's really in a bad mood today isn't he.

"Yep," said bill reading toms mind. "Maybe we should pull a prank on him?"

"Yeh," agreed tom, "but what should we do?"

"I know," Georg said jumping out of the cupboard, "we should put fake cocka-legs on him when he's sleeping."

"Yeh!" the twins agreed.

For some unknown reason tom had a bag of fake cocka-legs in his bag. Wonder why, thought bill, probs for pranks on me! Meany!

The boys covered Gustav in fake cocka-legs then hid in the cupboard with enough room for them to see Gustav. Tom jumped and made a big bang which woke Gustav up.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" he screamed, "wtf? Cocka-legs all over me ewwwwwwwwwwww…….. Wait a minute there fake or dead…… stupid twins this must have been their fault, I'll have to get them."

With that Georg pushed the twins out of the cupboard straight into Gustav jumping on the floor trying to get the fake cocka-legs off him.

"You too!" he screamed when he saw the twins, "I'm going to get you for this."

And with that the twins ran like the wind to hide from Gustav. But with tom's baggy pants he couldn't run fast and with bill being held up by tom they soon were tackled to the ground by an angry Gustav.

Quietly Georg snuck out of the room before Gustav could find out it was him that had the bright idea to put fake cocka-legs all over him.

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**A/n **

**So what do you think? **

**Plz R&R more to come!**


	2. German Boy

**A/n **

**Disclaimer- I don't own Tokio Hotel or American boy by Estelle**

**American boy changed into a song about tom kaulitz or bill and tom if you want.**

**888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888**

Just another one champion sound  
Me and Estelle about to get down  
Who the hottest in the world right now.  
Just touched down in London town.  
Bet they give me a pound.  
Tell them put the money in my hand right now.  
Tell the promoter we need more seats,  
We just sold out all the floor seats

Chorus (Estelle)  
Take me on a trip, I'd like to go some day.  
Take me to New York, I'd love to see LA.  
I really want to come kick it with you.  
You'll be my **German Boy**.

He said Hey Sister.  
It's really really nice to meet ya.  
I just met this 5 foot 1 guys who's just my type.  
I like the way he's speaking his confidence is peaking.  
Don't like his baggy jeans but I'm like what's underneath it.  
And no I ain't been to MIA  
I heard that Cali never rains and New York heart awaits. First let's see the west end.  
I'll show you to my bridrens.  
I'm like this **German ****Boy**.** German** **B****oy**

**Chorus**  
Take me on a trip, I'd like to go some day  
Take me to New York, I'd love to see LA.  
I really want to come kick it with you.  
You'll be my **German** **Boy**

Can we get away this weekend.  
Take me to Broadway.  
Let's go shopping baby then we'll go to a Café.  
Let's go on the subway.  
Take me to your hood.  
I never been to Brooklyn and I'd like to see what's good.  
Dress in all your fancy clothes.  
Sneaker's looking Fresh to Def I'm lovin' those Shell Toes.  
Walkin' that walk.  
Talk that slick talk.  
I'm likin' this** German** **Boy**. **German**** Boy**.

**Chorus**  
Take me on a trip, I'd like to go some day.  
Take me to New York, I'd love to see LA.  
I really want to come kick it with you.  
You'll be my** German** **Boy**

Let them know ……

_Kanye West_  
Who killin em in the UK. Everybody gonna to say you K, reluctantly,  
because most of this press don't f#k wit me.  
Estelle once said to me, cool down down don't act a fool now now.  
I always act a fool ow ow.  
Aint nothing new now now.  
He crazy, I know what ya thinkin.  
White Pino I know what you're drinkin. Rap singer. Chain Blinger.  
Holla at the next chick soon as you're blinkin.  
What's you're persona. About this **German** Brama. Am I shallow cuz all my clothes designer. Dressed smart like a London Bloke. Before he speak his suit bespoke.  
And you thought he was cute before.  
Look at this P Coat, Tell me he's broke. And I know you're not into all that.  
I heard your lyrics I feel your spirit. But I still talk that cash. Coz a lot wags want to hear it. And I'm feelin like Mike at his Baddest. The Pips at they Gladys. And I know they love it. so to hell with all that rubbish

**Estelle**  
Would you be my love, my love.  
could be mine would you be my love my love, could be mine  
Could you be my love, my love.  
Would you be my **German**** Boy**. **German**** Boy**

**Chorus**  
Take me on a trip, I'd like to go some day  
Take me to New York, I'd love to see LA.  
I really want to come kick it with you.  
You'll be my** German** **Boy**

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**A/n **

**Hope you like please review!**


	3. did i annoy you yet?

**A/n **

**Disclaimer: of course I totally own the boys…… NOT!!!**

**Thanks for reviewing peeps**

**You're going to hate this I promise!**

**010101010101010101010101010101010101010101**

1. G: orgeous  
2. E: xciting  
3. O: riginal  
4. R: ockin Awesome!  
5. G: reatest bassist

1. T: otally hot  
2. O: MG! His smile! amazing!  
3. M: y favorite guitarist in dreads Evr!

1. B: estest Sexiiest Talented Singer!  
2. I: ncredibley Amazing  
3. L: ovable!  
4. L: ove of my life

1. G : reat  
2. U : unforgettabley Hilarious  
3. S : hy _  
4. T : otally the best drummer ever  
5. A : wesome guy  
6. V : ery Friendly!

I Pledge Allegiance,  
To Tokio Hotel,  
of Germany,  
And To The Music,  
of Which They Play,  
one Nation,  
under Tokio Hotel,  
Invincible,  
With Hott German's For All!

You say pink  
I say black  
You say Nick Jonas  
I say Bill Kaulitz  
You say Holister  
I say Hot Topic  
You say pop  
I say Hard rock and Blues.  
You say I'm Punk  
I say It's better than being a prep  
You say I'm a weird  
I say DANKE SHON!  
if u agree put this on your channel

God had a perfect plan, he wanted TOM to be the most beautiful guy in the world... his plan was a sucsess for 10 minutes but then FAILED when BILL KAULITZ was born!_~

~sexy hips~  
~cute lips~  
~perfect smile~  
~kaulitz ~  
~ style~

TOKIO HOTEL:  
live it!  
breathe it!  
want it!  
need it!  
preach it!  
LOVE it!

It takes a minute to like their looks,  
It takes a song to like their music,  
It takes an hour to fall in love with them,  
It takes a day to become obsessed with them,  
But it takes a lifetime to forget them

Copy this on your channel if you're a TH fan  
We waited for infinity  
We screamed 'til we felt it  
We were ready when it was time to run  
We ran through the monsoon  
We got closer to the edge  
We didn't jump  
We broke away  
We're the forgotten children  
We're gonna live on if it is our final day  
We're gonna die when love is dead  
You came to rescue us  
You're always forever sacred to us  
And even if you're a thousand sea's far  
We'll raise our hands for you

God made coke, God made pepsi  
God made Bill so damn sexy..

God made coke, God made pepsi  
God made Toml so damn sexy..

God made coke, God made pepsi  
God made Georgl so damn sexy..

God made coke, God made pepsi  
God made Gustav so damn sexy..

TH FANS FIGHT FOR THEM AGAINST HATERS AND MAKE  
TH EVEN MORE POPULAR SO THEY CAN BECOME A LEGENDARY GROUP! PASTE THIS ON YOUR CHANNEL IF YOU AGREE!TH FANS STICK TOGETHER FOREVER!!

I pledge allegiance to the music,  
of sexy Germans of Tokio Hotel.  
and to the republic for which Bill's hair stands.  
one six-pack,  
under Tom's XXXL shirt.  
with Jumbie and skittles for all.

**101010101010101010101010100101101010101010**

**A/n**

**Did I annoy you? Hope so**

**Review and tell me if I did annoy you or not**

**Ps: I got all these things off ****TokioHotelObsessionX100**** 's profile**


	4. 50 hats and eyeliners

**A/n**

**I promised to update so here it is**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the boys….though I wish I did just so I could go shopping with bill :)**

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"Tom open your door I need your coffee," bill yelled knocking on his brothers door.

"Get your own," tom replied.

"I finished it last night."

"Well that's your fault isn't it," tom wasn't about to get up to open the door. His feet were killing him from all the shopping he had to do with bill this morning.

"Please?" bill whined, "if you give me your coffee I won't take you shopping again."

That promise was good enough for tom. Shopping with bill was worse then being in hell for 5 hours. He got up and gave bill all his coffee.

_An hour later (bill is on a caffeine high from drinking all the coffee)_

Hmmm, bill thought, I should play a trick on tom, but what could I do? I no, he answered his own question; I'll steal all his hats.

Bill snuck into tom's room while he was sleeping and stole all his hats; he ended up taking the whole suitcase because tom has like 50 hats. When tom woke up and was getting ready for the concert he couldn't find any of his hats.

"Billa," he screamed running into bill's room, "where did you put my hats?"

"Why are you talking about, I don't have them," bill replied not making eye contact with tom.

"Well since you won't give them to me I'll just steal all your eyeliner."

"You will never find it all."

How can I not find it all, tom thought, he can't have that much. Tom walked over to the dresser and opened every draw pulling about 4 out of each….. Wow, he thought, there's already about 23 in his pockets.

"There's still more," bill said.

He walked into the bathroom; on the counter was a whole pack of about 12 and around 7 in the draws.

"There's still more," bill said again.

Tom walked over to where some jeans were hanging; he pulled 4 more out of the pockets of the pants. He found 2 more on bill's bed stand. Ok, he thought, that has to be it. His pockets were full.

Bill pulled out 1 from his jeans pocket, tom snatched it off him. Bill pulled another out of his hair.

"What the fudge," tom said. He grabbed it off bill and stormed out of the room.

Dam, though bill, that was my last one. Now how am I going to be able to get ready for the concert?

**A/n **

**Review!!!!**

**He he bill has like 50 eyeliners and tom has like 50 hats :)**


	5. bill kaulitz bio

Allergic of apples  
-Doesn't like chocolate  
-Uses 30 min to get ready in the mornings  
-Was only 5 years old when he took part in a movie.  
-Allergic of mosquito/wasps  
-Has divorced parents  
-Says that he doesnt smoke, even though he has been caught while smoking with his friends on a resturant.  
-Born 10 minutes after his twin brother, Tom  
-Has a dog called "Scotty", and a cute cat called "Kasimir"  
-Was only 7 years old when he started writing his own songs.  
-Was really good at school, he got 1.9 in average. ( 1 is best, og 6 is the worse).  
-He hates sports  
-Says that he's a very sensitive person (emo?)  
-Has been single since 2, 1/2 years now, and hasnt kissed any girls since that.  
-Has the voice of "Arthur" in the animation movie "Arthur and the Minimoys" which came out 2007.  
-Wants to fall in** love** again.  
-Doesnt sees any impossibility falling in love with a fan, because then she could understand him better, and that he has to spend a lot of time with the band.

**Bill about his dream girl **

**Height:** 10 cm lower than me, I don't like the girls who's higher than me.  
**Haircolour:** dark hair, brown or black.  
**Style:** Whatever,doesn't really matter, but she has to have the style which suits her really much, and I think it should be manifoldly.  
**Character:** Uncontrollable!  
**Most important for her:** true love  
**Boobs:** Doesn't really matter.  
**Arms**: soft as the babies  
**Body:** Not too skinny, and not too heavy.  
**Music she listens to has to be:** not important.  
**Where she lives:** Not in German!!, it't most better for me if she doesnt live here.  
**Fan or not:** Hmmm, I don't know, the most important thing is that she loves me,and not my money

**Other facts:**

**Birth Name**  
Bill Kaulitz-Trümper

**Height****  
**6′ 2″ (1.88 m)

**Bilingual:** German, English and French.  
His parents divorced when he and his brother were 7 years old.  
His step-father owns a music school called, "Rock's cool".  
Favorite musicians are Nena, Green Day, Coldplay, Keane and Placebo.  
Likes Gothic fashion.  
Translated all his German songs to English for his band's English album.  
His mother is a freelance tailor.  
He is 10 minutes younger than twin brother, Tom Kaulitz.  
He and his brother, Tom, do not have middle names.  
Enjoys peppermint tea.  
His first concert he ever attended was Nena.  
Favourite food is Pasta.  
Is best friends with his twin brother.  
Had to undergo surgery to remove the cyst in one of his vocal chords. (March 2008).  
One of his favorite television programs is Prison Break.  
His good friend is Andreas, who is also the president of Tokio Hotel's fan club.


	6. georg listing bio

Full name: Georg Moritz Listing

**Date of birth: **31.3.1987

**Place of birth: **Halle

**Function in the band:** Bassist

**Weight:** 72 kg

**Hair-colour:** Brown

**Eye-colour**: Green

**Height**  
5′ 10″ (1.78 m)

**Trade Mark**  
His long hair.  
His muscles

**Fact**

His name is pronounced as "Geh-org".

He owns a black and white checkered guitar which has his band's name on it.

He is an only child.

His father is a dentist.

His parents are divorced.

His idol is Flea from Red Hot Chilli Peppers.

His favorite bands are Fall Out Boy and Oasis.

His favorite food is pasta.

He is the bassist of the German Rock band, Tokio Hotel.

**School: **Graduated from the German form of senior high.

**Favourite Subject in School:** Psychology.

**Hated Subjects in School**: Math and German.

**Hobbies: **Music and once in awhile sports.

**His Idol:** Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers

**Favourite Music:** Fall out boy, Billy Talent and Yellowcard.

**Favourite songs:** "Glamorous" von Fergie und "Golden" von Fall out Boy

**First album he ever bought:** "Definitely maybe" from Oasis

**First concert he's ever been to:** Die Ärzte

**Distinctive signs:** His muscles.

**Motto: **It always changes.

**Personality: **Georg and Tom are more alike when it comes to hitting on girls. He also enjoys showing his body off when on stage and usually strips his shirt off. Georg is also teased a lot from the twins due to his clumsiness. He also likes sleeping naked.


	7. gustav schafer bio

**Occupation:** Drummer

**Date of Birth:** September 8, 1988.

**Zodiac Sign:** Virgo.

**Place of Birth:** Magdeburg (Germany).

**Place of Residence:** Magdeburg, Germany and their temporary home in Hamburg which is where their studio is.

**Height:** 1,70cm (5′7″)

**Weight**: 68kg (150lbs)

**Hair Colour:** Dark blonde.

**Eye Colour:** Brown.

**Siblings**: An older sister.

**School:** He's graduated from the German form of senior high.

**Favourite Subject in School:** Sports and Economics.

**Hated Subjects in School:** Math and Physics.

**Hobbies:** Riding his bike and music.

**His Idol:** Lars Ulrich of Metallica.

**Favourite Music/Artists:** Metallica

**First album he ever bought:** "Black Album" from Metallica

**First concert he's ever been to:** A festival with many artists. Joe Cocker was one of them.

**Distinctive signs:** Always seen wearing a cap.

**Motto:** Hauptsache alles geht schief. (Which means the same as: As long as everything goes wrong)

**Personality**: Gustav is very a quiet and a cute person. He prefers to stay in the background. He's also very sensitive and can get moody and sulky really easily. He's also very impatient. He's always the first one to get up in the mornings and waits till the rest of the band drags themselves out of bed while he's already made breakfast and gotten ready. When you first get to know him - you realise that he is such a sweet heart!


	8. tom kaulitz bio

Has around 70 caps  
Bill's cat has attacked Tom once, cause he throw chips on her,( have you heard about that he also did throw a caps on her)?  
He overstate a lot!  
He eats all the time  
He hates (a drink)  
He is very good on skating  
He sings very loud while taking a bath  
He has broken his arm twice…  
He says that if he was "crazy" on money… he'd rather became a formel1 driver or a fotballplayer.  
When Bill and Tom were 6 yars old, they took a part in a TV show called " verruckt nach dir "  
He wrote the song "schwarz"  
He wrote the music of "hilf mir fliegen"  
He's fave animal is monkies:D  
Bill and Tom had braces.  
He hates tight clothes.  
He loves parties and drinking.  
He thinks that Angelina Jolie is too hot  
He admit to not be romantic

**Other Facts:**

**Date of Birth****  
**1 September 1989, Leipzig,  
**Birth Name****  
**Tom Kaulitz-Trümper  
**Height**  
5′ 11¾" (1.82 m)

Twin brother of Bill Kaulitz, a member of Tokio Hotel.  
Was born 10 minutes before his twin brother, Bill.  
Is an avid Hip Hop fan. His favorite artist to listen to is German Hip Hop singer Samy Deluxe.  
His favorite subject in school was Art.  
Received his first guitar when he was 9, by his step-father.  
His step-father owns a music school called, "Rock's Cool".  
Enjoys partying, hip hop, music, girls and graffiti.  
Favorite food is pasta.  
Favorite drinks are Cola and Strawberry Nesquick.  
Owns about 17 guitars.  
He has one luggage full of his caps when he is on tour.  
Bilingual: English and German.  
His most hated subjects at school were Maths and Physics.  
Owns a Black Cadillac car.  
He and his twin brother do not have middle names.


	9. Don't jump the food version

**A/n don't jump the food version!**

**Disclaimer: If I owned the boys I wouldn't be here duhhh I don't own the song either!!!!**

**66786476776768764876786764767965897**

_On top of the food,  
the turkey is so cold, yet so warm_

_I offer you a slice,  
but you're just not hungry anymore!  
The eyes of a city, are counting the food going down  
each one a promise  
that could possibly kill any clown_

_I scream into the fight for food  
please don't be rude  
IT'S MY FOOD_

_The bites will not guide you through!  
I will help you chew  
it's my food  
don't let pudding go, after the show  
I was going to eat that_

_it's my food_

_You open your mouth,  
but you can't remember what for…  
the hobos are fighting,  
but you're not hungry anymore_

_Just a few days ago  
you were eating food off the floor  
you dream of a the end,  
to eat it all over again_

_I SCREAM INTO THE FIGHT FOR FOOD! PLEASE DON'T BE RUDE! ITS MY FOOD_

Please don't be rude  
IT'S MY FOOD!  
The bites will not guide you through  
I will help you chew  
it's my food  
don't let pudding go, after the show  
I was going to eat that  
IT'S MY FOOD! MY FOOD

I don't know how long  
that chilli's been there  
I wouldn't eat that  
but I know you don't care

_just take my hand, but please don't bite it  
IT'S MY FOOD_

_I scream into the fight for food  
please don't be rude  
IT'S MY FOOD_

_The bites will not guide you through  
I will help you chew  
IT'S MY FOOD! IT'S MY FOOD_

_And if you're not going to eat all that  
then I'll eat the scraps_


	10. leave the monsun

"Leave the Monsoon"  
a parody of "Monsoon" (Durch den Monsun) by Tokio Hotel

It's been sunny up till now  
You promised me that you'd come round  
I've been waiting for you all this time

I didn't notice the first drop  
Or that point the sun just stopped  
But all too fast the rain came falling down

Now I'm in a monsoon  
My hair is wet  
My clothes are soaked  
And I'm really cold

It's raining hard  
The wind's blowing too  
And you should know it's all because of you

Just so you know i'm in a real bad mood  
In this monsoon  
All cause of you

It doesn't look like it'll stop  
I really wish I had a mop  
There's all these puddles seeping through my boots

And all my hairspray's washing out  
I'm so unfabulous right now  
Cause my mascara's running down my face

Wanna leave the monsoon  
My hair is wet  
My clothes are soaked  
And I'm really cold

It's raining hard  
The wind's blowing too  
And you should know it's all because of you

Just so you know I'm in a real bad mood  
And when you come I might just wail on you  
In this monsoon

HEY! Woo woo woo...

Screw it all, I'm going inside  
Where it's nice and warm  
It's not worth it to be outside  
I'm tired of this storm

From here in my room  
I can see you  
Here in my room  
See you...

And you're in the monsoon  
Your hair is wet  
Your clothes are soaked  
And you're really cold

It's raining hard  
The wind's blowing too  
And you should know I'm up here mocking you

Just so you know I'm in a real good mood  
As you go through what I had to go through  
In the monsoon

In the monsoon  
Laughing at you  
In the monsoon  
Laughing at you

**A/n review!!! I don't own the song it's by Carth ()**


	11. Ready Set Go

**A/n I cause no harm to tokio hotel with the lyrics in this song. I don't own this song or tokio hotel!!!**

Ready, Set, Go Spoof

We are Tokio Hotel  
We want albums to sell  
Tokyo's a word that we can't spell  
We like when you make a fuss  
We steal riffs from The Rasmus  
And wonder why people hate us

You know we rock your world  
I look like a girl

Ready, lets go and play songs live  
Take a tour bus 'cause we can't drive  
Together we can fake it  
While the music's playing: mime  
Oh, check out that rhyme.

We translated all our songs  
It didn't take that long  
That's why the grammar is wrong  
We want to play live more  
Leeds festival we'll ignore  
'Cause we would get bottled for sure

Us twins are such a pair  
Check my crazy hair

Ready, lets go and play songs live  
Take a tour bus 'cause we can't drive  
Together we can fake it  
While the music's playing: mime  
Oh, check out that rhyme

Waiting until the hype starts  
We are gonna top the charts  
Can't believe people rejoice  
Just when I lose my voice

Although I look this way  
I really am not gay

Ready, lets go and play songs live  
Take a tour bus 'cause we can't drive  
Together we can fake it  
While the music's playing: mime  
Check out that rhyme!

Ready, lets go and play songs live  
Take a tour bus 'cause we can't drive  
Together we can fake it  
While the music's playing: mime  
Oh, check out that rhyme


	12. World Behind My Wall

**Ok tokio hotel has put out a sneak peek of there new song world behind my wall from the humanoid album on Rollingstone **

**./2009/09/22/preview-tokio-hotels-world-behind-my-wall-from-humanoid/**

**so after listening to it for a few times I cam up with this being the lyrics **

**(mind you they are not 100% correct but as good as I could get)**

**I hope you like them!**

World behind me wall – Tokio hotel (sneak peek)

I'm ready to fall….

I'm ready to crawl..

On my knees to night…

And I..

I'm ready to give

I'm ready to feel……

Wo..oah….

They're telling me

It's beautiful……

I believe there's nothing

I ever know….

The world behind my wall

**When I add dots (…..) I means they sang that word longer and the more dots the longer it is.**

**Check out the preview (if you haven't already) and sing my lyrics to see how well they match.**

**Review please! Feedback is much appreciated and tell me what I got wrong. **

**Thanks **

**3 Rhi**


	13. Article

**Ok so I was on the internet and I stumbled across this article about Tokio hotel. **

**At the top there this picture of bill with these cool looking sunglasses on and the following article:**

_Tokio hotel should check out and go back to where they came from._

_Germany, this is ridiculous and you should knock it off. And everyone else in the world who supports this kind of behavior, we're looking at you too! Bill Kaulitz of Tokio Hotel, you probably didn't just step out of an eye exam, so there is absolutely no reason to wear such ridiculous shades._

_Seriously, when we first saw these snaps, coming out of Paris, we thought it was Ashley Tisdale going through a punk phase. Bill's delicate bone structure, flat-ironed hair and eyeliner obsession has long confused innocent bystanders into thinking he is a lady._

_We are still not 100% sure he is all man, but maybe if he and Lady Gaga combined, they would produce the world's most outrageously dressed hermaphrodite since __Hedwig and the Angry Inch__ (or, you know, Lady Gaga)._

_The flamboyant front man and his pop-rock bandmates were in the City of Lights to give interviews and promote their new single, "Automatic." We 'automatically' don't want to watch the music video that accompanies the song, but if you're curious to the kinds of boy-bander hijinks the Germans can get into in an African desert, you can check it out below._

**Then there is the video clip and some more photos of them.**

**I, personally, think this person who wrote this needs to get a life.**

**Here's the link so you can check it out: ****/2009/09/04/tokio-hotel-should-check-out-and-go-back-to-where-they-came-from/**

**Yeh just thought you guys might be interested in it. There also are some awesome looking photos there of the band.**


	14. Annoying Tom Kaulitz

**A/n I don't own tokio hotel or this list it belongs to someone on devinart or whatever it is. Review!!!**

30 Ways to Annoy Tom Kaulitz

1. Call him a perv in any way, shape, or form in every sentence you say.

2. Ask if he's Jamaican.

3. Whenever an advertisement for any feminine product comes on the TV, turn the volume all the way up and stare at him with wide, fascinated eyes.

4. Loudly tell anyone who happens to walk by that Kelly Clarkson is his personal hero.

5. Smack him upside the head every time he tries to flirt with someone and say "Bad Tom! Bad!"

6. Give away his every location to his fans.

7. Snip off a lock of his hair, set it on the floor, light candles all around it, and dance around the whole mess in some sort of cannibalistic ritual.

8. Steal all his hats and mail them to Peru.

9. In the middle of a concert run up to him and yell: "How can you perform when we're destroying the Ozone layer?"

10. When he's watching TV place a spinney office chair in his direct line of vision and start spinning around like a mad person yelling "I'm not wearing pants tooooooooday!!!!"

11. Cower in fear every time he says the word 'something'.

12. Constantly remind him that Bill is the boss.

13. Wake him up at five AM singing the most annoying song you know.

14. Duct tape his bedroom door shut so he can't escape.

15. Call him a racist dolphin.

16. Ask him tearfully why the kids just won't give that poor rabbit his cereal.

17. Paint his nails bright pink while he sleeps and hide the nail polish remover.

18. Come up with 30 ways to annoy him.

19. Put shaving cream on his hand when he sleeps and tickle his nose with a feather.

20. Put a cow in his room and wait for the surprise!

21. Place a very scary looking porcelain doll at the edge of his bed while he sleeps. Tape a ketchup smothered butcher knife in its hand.

22. Sing "Follow Me" by Uncle Kracker nonstop until it gets stuck in his head.

23. Sell his virginity on eBay.

24. Tell him you need a sacrifice and that he's the only one available at the moment.

25. Poke him. Just poke him nonstop until it drives him mad.

26. Dress up as Harry Potter and follow him around all day shouting random incantations.

27. Write him a very sappy love letter and sign it with Gustav's name.

28. 'Accidentally' break his most favourite guitar.

29. Babble nonstop about how MySpace is the downfall of society.

30. Make him help you compose evil plans of taking over the world.


	15. Georg Listing Von Trap!

**Omg guys did you know that in the sound of music captain von traps name is Georg!**

**Yep so that's were the inspiration from this came!!!**

"The hills are alive with the sound of music," Bill sang along to the TV.

"Shut up," Tom yelled.

"Omg," Bill exclaimed, "Georg!"

"What," Georg walked into the room.

"You didn't tell me they made a movie about you."

"Bill, that movie had all of us in it, remember."

"No," Bill shock his head, "the sound of music."

"The sound of music isn't about me!" Georg shouted.

"Yeah we all no Georg can't hold a tune," Gustav laughed.

"Well this proves you wrong Gusti," Bill proclaimed, "Georg why didn't you tell us your real name is Georg Listing Von Trap?"

"Because it's not,"

"Nice name captain," Tom snorted.

"My name is not Captain Von Trap!" Georg yelled.

"Whoa there don't get your panties in a twist," Gustav said, "and stop shouting you might strain your wonderful singing voice."

"Shut up, I don't sing and I'm not in the sound of music and my name is not Georg Listing Von Trap!" Georg yelled storming out of the room.

Gustav, Bill, and Tom looked at each other then burst out into song.

"The hills are alive with the sound of music!"

"Arggggg", Georg screeched from somewhere in the hotel suite.

**See funny right?**

**Review!!!!**

**Make sure to check out Humanoid!**

**Love you guys**

**Xx **

***tokiohotel-twilight-luver***


	16. Katie!

"Bill!" Tom screamed his twins' name.

"What Tomi?" Bill asked.

"What is this about you complaining about me?" Tom asked his twin.

"Tom I always complain about you," Bill replied smoothly.

"Yeah but you never complain that I need to change my hair colour because it's too much like yours!"

"I never complained about that," Bill said thoughtfully, "but I think I know who did."

"Ah," Tom said.

"Katie," They both shouted at the same time.

Katie was there new English translator and was always playing tricks on the band.

"Oh shit," Katie said.

She jumped up from playing poker with Gustav and ran out of the hotel room with two angry twins chasing her.

**A/n I know it's no good but I need to no if you guys want to be in a story of mine!!!!**

**Tell me!!!!**

**PM me!!!!**

**I need someone who can sing, someone who can play the drums and someone who plays the bass!!!**

**Oh and please tell me which Tokio hotel member you like best!!! **

**Thank you and REVIEW!!!! **


	17. I'll see my mom soon!

**A/n **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Tokio Hotel or this song!!!**

**Review !!!**

I'll see my mom soon

M' starin at the dairy door  
There's no milk left here anymore  
The aisle's cold its making me insane

I've been drivin round so long  
Another store seems to have come  
I see the bright lights commin up again

I will see my mom soon  
When i get the milk, its takin all my time  
My butt really hurts  
Drivin my car in to the black

When i see the closed store i think of you  
I kno that ill be drivin somewhere new  
To the dark moon, sent me not you

The moon just faded from my sight  
I see nothin with headlights  
The stores are gone and left me so alone

I kno i have to find milk now  
I need to sleep but dont kno how  
Why cant i make this darkness feel like home?

I will see my mom soon  
When i get the milk, its takin all my time  
My butt really hurts  
Drivin my car in to the black

When i see the closed store i think of you  
I kno that ill be drivin somewhere new  
And no one has what i need for you  
To the dark moon, yea,yea

I'm usin this horsepower, goin all the way  
Let it take me straight to milk  
I'll be drivin night and day

I'll find the milk soon, sent me not you  
I'll have it soon, so soon

I will see my mom soon  
When i get the milk, its takin all my time  
My butt really hurts  
Drivin my car in to the black

When i see the closed store i think of you  
I kno that ill be drivin somewhere new  
And no one has what i need for you  
To the dark moon

To the dark moon  
Sent me not you  
To the dark moon  
Sent me not you


	18. Quirky Quotes!

**A/n random tokio hotel quotes!**

Q: If you would ever change you band name again what would it be?

Georg: Georg and those two other guys.

Tom : Georg there are four of us.

Georg: but Bill's not a guy XD

Bill: asshole…xp

"And bill's tattoo I mean what is that thing? A jizz dartboard?" – Tom Kaulitz

Tom – admit it I rock your world.

Bill - … ok maybe just a little.

"if you don't like tokio hotel 'to much hairspray' is not a efficient answer to why, thank you very much" – Bill Kaulitz


	19. Tomato

**Automatic (Tomahto) Parody **

Disclaimer – I don't own Tokio Hotel or this song!

It's tomato (no, tomahto, no, tomato, no, tomahto)

It's potato (no, potahto, no, potato, no, potahto)

I say "tomato"

And you say that I'm dead wrong.

"Tomahto," you insist.

It's still that red thing,

Doesn't change with its title.

Why does this fight exist?

You know, I think there's

Too many similar words,

Like "fog," "low clouds," and "mist."

Two names for one thing

It's like "George W. Bush" and

"Humanity's cyst."

"Flat mountain"

And "plateau,"

"Lost frisbee,"

"UFO,"

"One-eared dude"

and "Van Gogh,"

"Worthless bum" and "CEO."

We need solutions,

Simplify all this madness.

We must mean what we say.

Let's all agree that

It's become pointless to guess:

"Dead woodchuck" or "toupee?"

It's so confusing, my brain's

Just about to splatter-

I mean gray matter!

"Antoinette,"

"Headless queen,"

"Farting less,"

"Going green,"

"Elephant,"

"Poop machine,"

"Wad of ads" and "magazine

"For teens."

It's tomato!

No, it's tomahto!

It's a veggie!

No way, it's fruity!

"My dog's confused,"

"Homework excuse,"

"Snails without shells,"

They're slugs-can't you tell?

Thesaurus, I think

Should really be extinct.

"Traffic cones,"

"Witches' hats,"

"Fresh roadkill,"

"Dog went splat,"

"Little kid,"

"Screaming brat,"

"Teeny rug,"

"Welcome mat."

"TV" and

"Id'yut box,"

"Random guess,"

"Buying stocks,"

"Shoes of death,"

"Purple Crocs,"

"Eleventh plague," "chicken pox."

It sucks!

(It's tomato)

Say it right!

(No, it's tomahto)

I insist!

(You know, I have)

Why does this fight

(A deep hatred)

Still exist?

(For tomatoes...)


	20. Video Game Nerd

**Monsoon(Video Game Nerd)Parody**

**Disclaimer – I don't own Tokio Hotel or this song!**

He's gonna take you to the past

to play the games that just suck ass

he'd rather have some shit dumped in his ear

He can't take it anymore

but he won't stop till level four

he'd rather down a skunk's asshole with beer

Angry Video Game Nerd

his rage is strong

he's the angriest guy

you've ever heard

his list is long

with many names

those coders should all perish in the flames

what were they thinking when they made those games

Video Game Nerd

Video Game Nerd

He's gonna puke over his feet

playing some shit no-one can beat

if it's from LJN it's sure to suck

With his Power Glove and Zapper gun

he's trying hard but it's no fun

flush down the toilet that shitload of fuck

Angry Video Game Nerd

his rage is strong

he's the angriest guy

you've ever heard

his list is long

with many names

those coders should all perish in the flames

what were they thinking when they made those games

They're pissing the hell out of poor James

Video Game Nerd

Hey!

Those fucking games are so bad

so bad he can spit

or say cowabunga

cowafucking piece of dog shit

Nintendo Nerd

Atari Nerd

Video Game Nerd

Angry Nerd

Angry Video Game Nerd

his rage is strong

he's the angriest guy

you've ever heard

his list is long

with many names

those coders should all perish in the flames

what were they thinking when they made those games

They're pissing the hell out of poor James

Video Game Nerd

Nintendo Nerd

Atari Nerd

3DO Nerd

Video Game... Nerd


	21. I have more sex in my voice

**A/n Hahahah I love Tom! x'D**

**Disclaimer: not my interview.**

Meanwhile, Tom Kaulitz talks about the different dynamics he and brother Bill have in their voices, saying one thing separates them: "I have more sex in my voice," Tom explained. "Actually, the decision [for Bill to be the lead singer] was because of the securities. The securities asked us for it, because if I sing, there would be an escalation at each show. To calm things down, we went with Bill."

Tom also discussed how his brother has to work to remember the songs they are recording for when they hit the road. "He needs to remember everything for the tour. I actually did all of the recordings up to now," he said. "He needs to learn everything for our tour, which is why we rented this studio. We'll check it out, and hopefully he'll manage the upcoming albums without me."

He also talked about the time the guys in the band tried out different roles. "Bill was playing bass, because it's the easiest," Tom recalled. "He only had to play a few tones. Yes, I [played the drums. Drummer Gustav Schäfer], he sang, and [bassist] Georg [Listing] played the guitar. That was wicked. I think we performed [the _Scream_ track] 'Monsoon,' didn't we?

"[Gustav turned it into hardcore metal] to cover [the fact] that he can't sing," Tom continued. "I was perfect. Like a clockwork. But the others messed it up."


	22. Note

**Authors note:**

This story is now on hiatus for awhile because I have lost my inspiration.

It will be started again later once I have finished other stories.

Thanks for reading!

I'll tell you when it is starting again.

Love,

**Tokio-Bizarre-Bridesmaid**


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